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To Clarify
I knew nothing about cancer before Ashtyn’s diagnosis. I mean nothing. After two months I am no where near an expert on leukemia. The only things I know are from whatI’veseen and learned from staff around me. I don’t research or read books, web pages, articles, or literature of any kind about cancer. I don’t…
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The Ministry of Angels
Ashtyn has been back in her room from the pediatric ICU for 36 hours. She looks good. She feels good. From now on I will constantly be on high alert with her. My eyes are more wide open for when her body does something out of the ordinary. My heart is more open to when…
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Second Trip to the ICU
On March 15th, Ashtyn was devastated to go back to the hospital after only being home for four days. “Why do I have to be here? Why can’t I do the chemo at home? I feel fine!” Every day Ashtyn asked when she could go home. I explained, “You need to be in the hospital…
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coping
On February 1st, two days after Ashtyn was hospitalized, I received a message from Brady, whose daughter Millie was on the same floor. “Suzanne, I’m very sorry to hear about Ashtyn. While I’m no expert, we’ve been dealing with this now for over three years, so I can give some advice on how to deal…
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Prayer is Part of Our Routine
After spending 45 out of 48 days at Primary Children’s Hospital, Ashtyn and I know the routine. Attending, fellow, and resident doctors, nurse practitioners, registered nurses, child life specialists, anesthesiologists, pharmacists, house keepers, dietitians, physical and occupational therapists, techs, volunteers, psychologists, integrated medicine specialists, and parents of other patients are becoming familiar and conversations are…
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Side Effects
Ashtyn was very tearful today. She is not only struggling with having to be in the hospital for an unknown amount of time but she also is dealing with side effects from the chemotherapy drugs being given. She started four of the five chemotherapy drugs she’ll be taking for the next two weeks. Chemotherapy drugs…
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Home Away from Home
I didn’t necessarily rush to the hospital this morning. At noon Ashtyn and I walked into the hospital, took the elevators straight up to the 4th floor, washed our hands at the entrance of the immunocompromised unit, and was greeted at the door by our nurse. Ashtyn was quietly upset she was assigned to a different room…
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Heading Back
From the moment I heard that Ashtyn had cancer, I never believed the path would be easy. I understood her journey would be a roller-coaster. I knew I needed to cherish the happy times. During difficult times I knew I needed to have hope that good times would come again. This week was a good…
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Are We Really Strangers?
Since Ashtyn was diagnosed with cancer at the end of January, we have received many messages on the website and Facebook Many times we have heard phrases such as, “I don’t know you.” “We have never met.” “I just came across your blog.” “You don’t remember me Ashtyn, but I knew you when you were young.”…
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How We Got Home
Saturday we really expected Ashtyn to be able to go home. She had met most of the discharge requirements. She was awake and alert, walked well, ate and drank enough, didn’t have significant pain, her temperatures were normal, and overall she looked really good. Thursday and Friday her white blood cell count (WBC) went up.…