Category

Triumphs

This Kind Can Come Forth By Nothing, But By Prayer and Fasting

By | Daily Life, Miracle, Prayers, Trials, Triumphs, Uncategorized | 11 Comments

My last post was written two nights ago.  Ashtyn’s health had been getting progressively worse with each day.  By Tuesday night she was on the verge of having high risk surgery to remove her appendix.  Diarrhea and vomiting seemed to be occurring every couple of hours.  She had lower lobe pneumonia with an increased respiratory rate and oxygen needs.  The color of her extremities didn’t look good.  Even though she was only getting a small amount of pain medication, she seemed more out of it than she should have been.  Ashtyn wasn’t able to talk well, open her eyes well, sleep well, or walk well.  She had even fallen one time because she got out of bed before I could get to her.  I was very nervous and wasn’t alone with my concerns.  The healthcare team watched her like a hawk.  She kept me and her nurse running constantly.  By 7:30 pm I was so concerned about her declining health.  I told the doctors I thought she needed to be move to the pediatric ICU.  PICU?  That’s the last place I normally would want her to go.  It’s a germ nightmare for a neutropenic patient with no ability to fight infection.  It’s also extremely uncomfortable sleeping in a chair when I have been spoiled by my couch-bed.  But I didn’t know what else to do as I observed the direction she was going.  The doctors considered PICU briefly but held on the idea.  I knew if she went downhill any further she would be moved and monitored in the PICU.  It then hit me what I had to do, call upon Ashtyn’s Army for prayers.  Enough was enough.  We needed to get her better.  I texted my family who suggested we fast.  Who would be willing to fast on a Wednesday and Thursday?  I had no choice but to ask because I knew Ashtyn couldn’t wait until Sunday.  She needed to start getting better right away.  I sent a Facebook message that read: “Because of how sick Ashtyn is I am asking anyone who is interested to fast for Ashtyn starting this afternoon or evening and ending Thursday.  She has pneumonia in her lower left lung that we don’t want to get worse.  She has appendicitis that we don’t want to get further inflamed.  We don’t want her to get an infection.  Mostly we want her to make white blood cells so her body can recover fully and then she will feel better.”

There was an immediate response.  Some started their fast right away.  Others’ prayers became more specific and fervent.

Tuesday night I laid beside her until 6:30 am.  She didn’t want me to leave her side. I described the night in my “Relying on What I Know” post: “She sleeps, goes to the restroom, suctions her mouth, sleeps, throws up, suctions her mouth, sleeps, coughs up mucus, throws up, sleeps, goes to the restroom, and on it goes.

After over a week of her getting worse she began to stabilize Wednesday.  I am not saying she got better.  I am saying she stopped getting worse.  With the start of fasting and prayers it seemed as if her decline had halted.  She did become more alert throughout Wednesday and for the first time in over a week she didn’t scare me one time all day.  She simply hovered in calm stability.  24 hours after asking for prayers and fasting, Ashtyn moved from being “stable” to slowly improving.  Wednesday night was restful.  She didn’t throw up all night.  Her trips to the restroom were minimal.  She was completely alert.  I had 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep.  On Thursday morning the first thing she did was get on her phone and with a great amount of effort and concentration she posted to Facebook  “Please fast and pray for me tomorrow.  I have so much mucus in my mouth that it hurts to eat or drink and I am SO thirsty. Thank you so much.” (I don’t think she realized it was already Thursday morning because she went right back to sleep after the Facebook status was posted.)  She clearly has faith.  She clearly has hope in her Army.

It is now early Friday morning.  All the 24 hour fasts, from those who did so, are over.  There have been 48 hours of prayers petitioning for God’s help with her immediate and specific need to get better.  I will tell you, your prayers and fasting have changed her course.  All concerns have dissipated.  She went from heading to the pediatric ICU to sitting up in bed alert and talking during the day.  At night instead of throwing up and getting up and down, she now sleeps restfully.  Ashtyn was heading downhill and now she is on the road to recovering from this round of chemo.

For 10 days Ashtyn’s temperatures have remained above 101 F after taking Tylenol and climbed to over 103 F before the next Tylenol dose was due.  Today? Her high temperatures were near 101 and decreased to 99.5 with Tylenol!  Amazing!

Ashtyn has not had the TV on for over a week.  Today the TV was on all day.  She started the day watching Soul Surfer.  Then she watched The Incredibles, Lion King, Princess and the Frog, and the Disney Channel.  Ashtyn fell asleep during each movie but it doesn’t matter, she had the desire to watch TV rather than lay in bed in silence.

She was awake a lot more today and talked quite a bit.  Her throat and mouth are still very painful when she talks or swallows.  However when she does talk her words are clear and lucid.  Today I didn’t have to keep the lights off and remind everyone to be quiet.  She was fine with noise and the stimulation’s of the day.  Her legs are steady when she walks and she is less shaky as time progresses.  (I do continue to stay behind her with my arms around her back as she walks to the restroom just to be safe.)  Today I was so excited when she asked to open a few presents.  She hasn’t had it in her to open any presents or cards since Valentine’s Day, which even then she was only able to open a few.  After I showered and got ready for the day she said, “Mom I like your shirt.”  That’s my girl!  Since becoming a preteen she is my fashion consultant because I am horrible at knowing what looks good and she has a really good eye for it.

For the past week I haven’t had very many visitors come because she has been so sick and time consuming.  Today I felt perfectly happy and comfortable having visitors.  Ashtyn had a nasal scope today to test for a sinus fungal infection.  She was completely calm and didn’t move at all when they stuck the camera down her nose.  (The test came back negative.)  Another miracle is she didn’t throw up or have diarrhea one time today.  Prior to today she had occurrences at least every two hours.  After many restless nights of sleep, Ashtyn is sleeping peacefully and didn’t need me to sleep near her.

I know it was because of fasting and prayer that Ashtyn triumphed over this most recent hurdle. That I am sure of.  Mark 9:29 “This kind can come forth by nothing, but by prayer and fasting.”  Thank you so much for all your thoughts, prayers, fasting, and positive energy.  I have been told by different people of different religions that they are praying and sending good vibes for Ashtyn.  Whether it is a prayer from a Mormon, Jew, Catholic, Protestant, or positive energy from a Buddhist, it matters not to me or the God in whom I believe.  He answers prayers and listens to all of his children.

Fortifying and Gathering Reinforcements

By | Daily Life, Inspirational, Trials, Triumphs, Uncategorized | 7 Comments
We Can Do Hard THings

These cancer bugs with X’s over them are from Ashtyn’s Grandma Poulsen. They are hung in front of Ashtyn’s bed to remind her that she can do hard things and destroy her cancer.

OK Ashtyn’s Army, we are all fortifying our battlefields and preparing for war!  I can feel it! Ashtyn’s Army is increasing in number, strengthening in faith, and rallying in service.  Comments are being heard, prayers are being offered, hearts are being touched, love is being poured out, visits are adding strength, efforts are gathering, children are being taught, adults are growing, friends and family are uniting, and together we are going to kick this cancer’s butt!

Ashtyn’s Army is doing all they can to strengthen her by utilizing their own strengths.  All efforts are empowering and uplifting.

Ashtyn will continue to have visitors come daily to help strengthen her.  One visitor will help guide Ashtyn to her happy place to find peace and hope.  Another will provide music therapy to sing out anger and joy.  Others will come for girl talk.  She will have those who will massage her and provide essential oils.  Pictures will be taken of milestones, dark times, and triumphs.  There will be times for the calm spirited visitors to sit beside her, providing comfort and not requiring anything from her.  Other times she will have visitors that bring laughter.  Words of encouragement and purpose will come.  There are those who will bring in food that she can tolerate.  Already there has been tranquil music, inspiring talks, funny stories, letters written, and uplifting gifts brought.  She’ll continue to read comments and see support on Facebook and her website.  Purpose has been given to Ashtyn knowing that this trial is not a waste of time.  She will know that her pain, struggles, and sacrifice will not be in vain because of the stories being shared of lives already being changed.

Family Army

Laughing with Kristi and Natalie
Family Army

Opening Letters From School - Friend and Community Army

Opening Letters From School
Friend and Community Army

Nurse Entertaining Ashtyn

Nurse Entertaining Ashtyn
Medical Army

Ashtyn is doing her part in preparing and fortifying too.  She is putting on her armor of strength, determination, independence, confidence, perspective, acceptance, and is starting to take charge.  She is being raised up by your prayers and is getting ready to rock this thing.

HER DETERMINATION:  For 12 hours today she forced herself to eat. Every bite was a bite she didn’t want to take, but she did it.  No way was she going to let some stupid NG tube win.  Every day she will tolerate different food.  A great deal of effort was made to provide her with food she could handle.  After much trial and error, this is what she ate today:  cheesecake for breakfast, a cup of homemade creamy potato soup from my friend Angie, a few bites of Ice Cream, one Trader Joe’s yogurt, 32 ounces of rootbeer, a bowl of Top Ramen, one entire cup of noodle soup, a small Red Mango, and ½ can of Sprite.  She did not throw up once! I am guessing close to 1500  calories again.  Way to go Ashtyn!!!!

HER INDEPENDENCE:  She doesn’t get nervous when I leave the room.  When an aide came to weigh her today she made sure to remind me that she needed to wear the mask to go in the hall.  Ashtyn informed me when she needed to brush her teeth. (The appearance of her tongue is changing however no mucositis yet.  Keep praying that she won’t have to deal with the pain that mucositis causes.)  Though there was no desire for a shower tonight, Ashtyn pushed through her fatigue and showered because she knew that showering every other night is important.  She makes sure that the food she eats is correctly written on the dry erase board.  She does her own eye drops and walks with her awkward IV pole on her own to the restroom.

HER CONFIDENCE:  Ashtyn is now able to talk about the future of when she loses her hair without crying.  She is going to pray and ask, since she’ll suffer the loss of her hair, if He would bless her that her hair will grow back straight instead of curly.  Ashtyn has accepted as best she can that she does have cancer.  She now can hear the words “cancer” and “chemotherapy” without falling into a depression.

HER PERSPECTIVE:  Contemplating cancer and the support she has received she said “At the end of this, I will know how many people care.  If I hear that someone else has cancer, I’ll know how they feel and can help them.  I don’t want to work here because I don’t want to see kids in pain, but I’ll volunteer.”

HER ACCEPTANCE:  Last night she asked, “Am I going to be here for a month?”   I paused and admitted, “Yes you will be.”  The tears came, but only for a brief moment as I explained why she has to stay.  “The doctors are trying to get you home for good as soon as possible.  They figured out the best way to accomplish that goal is to put you on different chemotherapy drugs that I can’t give you at home.  You’ll get the chemo for 10 days.  After 10 days you will be done with the chemo but will have to stay in the hospital 20 more days just to make sure you don’t get sick.  You won’t have any ability to fight infection so you’ll need to stay in your clean hospital room to stay safe.”  Miraculously she was quite calm and accepted it.  I remember only a few days ago how distressed she was at the thought of staying for more than a few days.

After only eight days of being in the hospital, Ashtyn has become noticeably stronger mentally and emotionally, preparing for when she becomes physically weaker.  She has done remarkably well during her first four days of chemotherapy, giving her time to build determination and confidence in herself that she can fight this. Only because of your prayers and support could she have done so well. Thank you.

We Can Do Hard Things

My friend Lisa made one of these posters for Ashtyn and one for my other kids

“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”  Philipians 4:13